Parenting from a Biblical and Reformed Perspective

Parenting is a sacred responsibility that comes with great challenges and blessings. In today's world, parents face numerous pressures and influences that can make raising children seem daunting. However, for those who hold to a biblical and reformed worldview, there is a rich and profound source of wisdom and guidance found in the pages of Scripture. It’s important to explore the principles of parenting from a biblical and reformed perspective, drawing insights from the Word of God and the teachings of the Reformed tradition.

God's Design at the heart of the biblical and reformed perspective on parenting is the recognition that God is the ultimate parent and that he has established the family as the foundational institution for human society. In the book of Genesis, we read that God created man and woman in his image and blessed them, commanding them to be fruitful, multiply, and fill the earth (Genesis 1:27-28). From this, we learn that children are a gift from the Lord and parents are called to steward this precious gift with love, discipline, and instruction. In the role of parents, the Bible teaches that parents have a dual responsibility to nurture and discipline their children. In Ephesians 6:4, the apostle Paul exhorts fathers to bring up their children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. This verse emphasizes the importance of nurturing children with love and care and providing them with the guidance and correction they need to grow into mature and responsible adults. The Reformed tradition emphasizes the importance of discipline as an expression of love, rooted in the understanding that children are born with a sinful nature and need to be taught and guided in the ways of righteousness. Modeling Christlikeness is central to parenting, biblically this is not a suggestion but rather a command. It’s not something that we will always get right; it’s something we cannot do apart from Jesus and the work of the Holy Spirit.

Mom and Dad will be the closing picture of Jesus that children ought to see, and this must be from the day a child is born. This means demonstrating humility, patience, kindness, and self-control in all aspects of life. In Colossians 3:21, Paul instructs fathers not to provoke their children, but to bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. This implies that parents should be mindful of their own conduct and attitudes, knowing that their children are watching and learning from them. As parents, we must believe in the power of prayer and trust in God. Amid the challenges and uncertainties of parenting, the bible encourages parents to rely on the power of prayer and to trust in the sovereignty of God. Proverbs 22:6 advises, "Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it." This verse reminds parents of the importance of faithfully teaching and training their children while trusting in God's providence for the outcome. Prayer becomes an essential tool for seeking God's wisdom, guidance, and grace in the daily trenches of parenting.

Parenting from a biblical and reformed perspective is a high calling that requires dedication, wisdom, and dependence on God. By grounding their approach to parenting in the teachings of Scripture and the insights of the Reformed tradition, parents can find timeless principles and practical guidance for nurturing and disciplining their children. The goal of biblical and reformed parenting is to raise children who love and honor God, contribute to society, and fulfill their God-given purpose. Parents can find much rest in Christ, not only for salvation but also in the life of your kids-trusting that despite our imperfections, we can rest in his sovereignty.

In the words of Paul Tripp from his book ‘On Parenting’: “So your hope as a parent is not found in your power, your wisdom, your character, your experience, or your success, but in this one thing alone: the presence of your Lord. The Creator, Savior, Almighty, Sovereign King is with you. Let your heart rest. You are not in this parenting drama alone. Your potential is greater than the size of your weaknesses, because the One who is without weakness is with you, and he does his best work through those who admit that they are weak but in weakness still heed his call.”

Finding Comfort and Hope After Divorce

Divorce is a deeply painful and challenging experience. Its impact can be overwhelming for those who go through it. When supporting a friend or loved one who has been through a divorce, it’s important to offer comfort and guidance that aligns with their faith and that provides hope for the future.

From a biblical perspective, there are powerful teachings and messages that can offer solace and encouragement to those who are navigating the aftermath of divorce. The Bible acknowledges the pain of divorce as well as the brokenness that accompanies it. In Malachi 2:16, God says, "I hate divorce," emphasizing the gravity of the dissolution of marriage and the emotional toll it takes on individuals. However, the Bible also offers reassurance and hope for those who have experienced divorce. It teaches that God is a compassionate and loving presence who offers comfort and healing to those who are suffering. One of the central messages of the Bible is the promise of God's unfailing love and faithfulness. In the book of Psalms, we find verses such as Psalm 34:18, which declares, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." This verse reminds us that God is intimately involved in our pain and is there to provide comfort and solace during times of distress. Sharing this message with someone who has been through a divorce can offer them

reassurance that they aren’t alone in their suffering, that God is present in their midst, as well as offering hope and healing.

Another important aspect of offering comfort from a biblical perspective is to remind the individual of their worth and value in the eyes of God. Despite the challenges and heartache of divorce, the Bible teaches that every person is deeply loved and cherished by God. In Psalm 139:14, the psalmist proclaims, "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Reminding someone of their inherent worth as a beloved child of God can help them find strength and confidence as they navigate the aftermath of divorce.

Furthermore, the Bible offers guidance on forgiveness and the importance of letting go of bitterness and resentment. In Ephesians 4:32, we are encouraged to "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Encouraging someone who has experienced divorce to embrace the path of forgiveness, both towards their former spouse and themselves, can be a powerful source of healing and restoration.

As a friend or loved one seeking to offer comfort from a biblical perspective, it is essential to provide a listening ear and a compassionate presence. Sometimes, simply being there to listen and empathize with their pain and struggles can be a profound source of comfort. Sharing passages from the Bible that speak to the themes of hope, healing, and God's enduring love can also provide much-needed encouragement and strength. In addition to spiritual support, it’s important to help the individual find practical resources and guidance as they move forward after divorce. This may include connecting them with support groups, counseling services, or other resources that can help them navigate the practical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of their journey.

Ultimately, offering comfort to someone who has been through a divorce from a biblical perspective involves sharing the message of God's love, compassion, and hope. Comfort them by reminding them of their worth in God's eyes, encouraging forgiveness and healing, reminding them who they are in Christ, and reminding them of their union with Christ. The remedy to dealing with the pain of sin committed, or sin committed against you, is to

simply look to Christ.